I am very happy (and he said that he is happy when he is with me) and like him the more I get to know him. He’s attentive (he texts and chats with me online every day), affectionate, asks me out regularly (we have seen each other multiple times every week since we met), and makes time for me (he has a lot of interests and activities).

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And, if I don’t talk with him immediately, when is the right time to talk about being exclusive (if he doesn’t bring it up)? I’m going to give you a cheat sheet to tell you the most effective way to get into a relationship with a new guy.

Before I do, I’d like to pre-empt all of the people who are inclined to tell me I’m wrong because they did it another way: yes, there are 100 ways to do things.

You can theoretically have unprotected sex with a stranger in the bathroom of a bar and end up spending the rest of your life with him.

I would like to know that he isn’t sleeping with anyone else and won’t be sleeping with anyone else while we are sleeping together.

Should I have the “defining the relationship” conversation with him or should I wait and allow things to evolve more?

I am scared of getting hurt and us not being on the same page.

But, I am equally scared of pushing for something that is happening naturally and perhaps making him feel pressured and stressed about something that is easy and great, naturally. If I talk with him, how do I bring up being exclusive so that he doesn’t feel pressured?

But, we are technically not exclusive (meaning, we talked prior to sleeping together and said that we were both able to date others, if we wanted).

However, we talked more recently and we both said that we aren’t dating anyone else, but we didn’t explicitly say that we are exclusive.

He still has his online dating profile up and checks it regularly (we met on the site).

I trust him and know that he is being honest, but now that we have slept with each other, it makes me feel vulnerable and nervous.